Laying foundations for marriage

Helen and David are seeking to offer marriage preparation to couples in Birmingham through the city’s register office, where 10,000 weddings a year are registered. They’re doing this through The National Couple Support Network (a joint initiative between Care for the Family and Relationship Central at Holy Trinity Brompton).

It’s a big vision and the support of their church, Sutton Coldfield Baptist Church, is vital. “Knowing that the church shares our vision for reaching out to people who are starting out in married life is incredibly important,” says David. “They have made us mission partners in recognition of the capacity of our work for outreach.”

David and Helen’s own experience is key to their commitment to providing marriage preparation, which they do under the banner of ‘Foundations - West Midlands’.

“We’ve both been divorced,” says David. “And then when we married we didn’t get any preparation. But now, through our work with divorce recovery, marriage enrichment and marriage preparation, we know just how valuable it would have been for us.”

Marriage preparation is a great opportunity to offer couples help right at the beginning, giving their marriage the best possible start. But churches thinking of getting involved in offering marriage preparation need to be aware that they may have to deal with problems which already exist, as Helen explains:

“Many couples live together before getting married, and we often find we’re doing marriage preparation with people who are experiencing a crisis in their relationship already. It’s fairly easy to see why so many marriages break down in the first few years, if people are getting married when their relationship is already strained.”

In seeking to work through the register office, Helen and David have gained council funding for leaflets advertising the availability of marriage preparation. The need for churches to work alongside register office staff is vital. “The staff are stretched already,” says David. “Realistically, if marriages are going to be stronger – and last longer – it’s down to churches and individuals to get involved and be active.

Last Updated 27 July 2009